Each person could have a new marriage if the person commits to be the new one in their marriage.
The things, which we think should change, overwhelm us: it looks impossible or too hard. But instead of looking at everything - look at just one thing.
Pick one new thing that you personally can do differently and you can have a new marriage.
The most dramatic changes can come when we change our attitude or the way we speak to each other.
Instead of tackling all of them, pick one out of this list and commit to do it differently for just one month! Most of us can do something differently when we see an end in sight.
Try one of these:
- Don’t criticize, complain, or have a cross word before breakfast.
- Eliminate calling your spouse a bad name - “you idiot” or “jerk” or others.
- Use an affirming word or phrase when your spouse is talking, so that he knows you are listening - “that’s interesting” or “then what happened” or “I’m sorry that you had to go through that today.”
- Look at her and listen while she is talking.
- Put your phone in another room while you eat dinner and when you go to bed.
- Assume good will. If the other person says something that sounds hurtful, assume that she/he isn't trying to be hurtful and ask for clarification.
- Give a hug every morning before you leave the house.
- Text “I love you” one a day for no reason.
- Focus on the good in your spouse, keep a list, add to it.
- Change one habit that upsets/irritates your spouse.
*Hint: this works with other relationships too! After a month, you will want to continue it!