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Healing in a Damaged Marriage

At LIVING WELL, we see many marriages in a crisis. Some couples are eager to reconcile and to save their marriage; others give up or look for the other one to change without examining their own heart. We believe that marriages can be healed and be better than ever.

Rejoice with us in a marriage that is in ongoing process of healing. 
Their words:

Wife: We were in a very broken place when we first started at Living Well. My husband wasn’t sure if he still wanted to be in this marriage, he had recently had an affair, and I was desperately trying to hold it all together, save our marriage, and learn how to forgive and move past the pain and hurt that was controlling my life. Our marriage hadn’t been *terrible* leading up to this point, but communication was severely lacking.

The biggest thing that changed was my husband giving his life over to God. Once that happened, our family started to heal. Relationships were mended. Our family dynamic slowly improved. For me, God helped me move past my anger, hurt and bitterness. He helped me to see my husband's heart and not solely focus on his offense. It is a continual process of growth and forgiveness, but we are having so many more good days than bad days.

Through Living Well, we learned some MUCH needed communication skills. Issues and grievances are no longer being swept under the rug and left to linger until they build up and explode. Disagreements are being resolved before our heads hit the pillow. That alone is HUGE for us. It is so refreshing to wake up that next morning with no ill-feelings towards your spouse. Speaking for my husband, I think a huge thing he has learned is that all women are complex. And emotional. And need to feel loved. I have learned that men are simple. And yearn for respect more than feeling loved. And that they will never, ever, understand fully, how a woman’s mind works.

Aside from the pain that I still feel at times, the guilt that he still feels, I truly, honestly feel that our marriage is better than it’s ever been. And I feel that once the pain and guilt have completely subsided, that our marriage WILL be the best it’s ever been. I cannot WAIT for that! Marriage is easier with communication skills in place. We appreciate each other more. Intimately, we are like newlyweds again! Spiritually, we are walking hand-in-hand, praying together daily, and growing together in Him.

Husband: First starting counseling, I was really lost and dealing with a lot of stress and grief. I had just put my wife through something I will spend the rest of my life making up to her. Which is fine. Most importantly, I hit rock bottom. And I have been pretty low before, but this was worse. I knew God, but never fully gave my life to Him. Living Well’s literature and itinerary really helped me to recognize what I was doing wrong and how to fix it. The tools being based on God’s principals were everything I needed to reestablish my role as a husband and establish my role as a Godly husband my wife has always wanted.