We usually see adversity in our life as a bad thing. None of us like adversity .... in fact we would probably think people are odd if they do like it.
Adversity in life can bring a husband and wife closer together. If the adversity is conflict between a husband and wife, how well they are able to work through and talk about the conflict determines their level of marital satisfaction, not the conflict issue itself.
If the adversity is a circumstance in their lives (job loss, illness, etc.), it can draw them closer together or make them feel isolated. The adversity can draw them closer if they face it together, talk about it, not blame. When they are able to work together as a team, the oneness develops. If they aren't able to work together, then the circumstance drives a wedge between them.
The day-to-day difficulties that a couple faces produce opportunities for a couple to apply some glue to their relationship. The glue takes some time to set up, but it will. And the couple will bond, the oneness grows stronger. This process doesn't happen overnight, it takes years.
"We have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us." Romans 5:1-5
